GRAN TORINO: An Old Man's Strength.

As you may remember from one of my earlier "Trailer Time" segments, I really liked the trailer for GRAN TORINO, Clint Eastwood's lastest starring role, which he also directed, but I have to admit; it had me fooled. As good as the trailer looked, I just couldn't get myself on board with the idea of seeing what seemed like it would amount to an artsy DEATH WISH-esque movie; a grisled old man, hardened by a long, difficult, life gets crossed by some punk-ass wannabe gangsta's and sets out to get himself some sweet, violent, vigilante justice. I'm no prude. I like a violent revenge movie just as much as the next guy, but being afflicted by a case of the winter blah's and current events (Re: the shooting at Osgoode station is just a little to close to home) really just doesn't leave me in the mood to glorify murder, no matter how righteous or justified it might be. But providence left me with no choice but to watch GRAN TORINO tonight, which I planned on doing eventually anyways, and I was shocked to find that this movie was not what I was lead to believe at all.

Let's face it: Clint Eastwood knows how to direct a fucking movie. GRAN TORINO, from the first few seconds to the last word to roll off the credit's, is just a masterfully crafted piece of storytelling. Without having to even speak a single word, you know everything about Eastwood's character by the end of the first scene, as he reacts to the things around him, so by the time he does speak, he doesn't have to waste any time on pointless exposition, or bullshit movie dialouge meant to convey information to the audience that the people speaking it would otherwise have no need to say in reality, and reality is the word of the day for GRAN TORINO. Everything about the movie feels genuine and real. There's nothing staged or over dramatic. Even the way the camera is set up has a matter-of-fact attitude about it. There's no elaborate crane shots or extreme angles; it's just where it needs to be to tell a story. That's not to say that the movie doesn't look good; the framing and use of lighting to sell the mood or heighten drama makes some scenes feel like painting in their quiet, subtle, beauty.

Beyond this, though, Eastwood isn't afraid to confront some tough issues, such as selfishness, the generation gap, racism, gang violence, and just general violence as a means to an end, but not in such a way as to appear preachy or to make the audience purposely uncomfortable; quite the opposite, I was surprised by how many outbursts of laughter the movie provoked, with it's wry and ironic sense of humor and straight forward delivery, illustrating the difference between blind hatred and ignorance, and how knowledge and understanding can overcome a lifetime of preconceptions and bad habits.

But aside from those issues, the movie has a great humanity to it. Eastwood portrays a stubborn man, a man trying to be strong in the face of lose, now left alone with nothing but his regrets. He feels the world start to pass him by and fears what comes next, but is too proud to confide those fears in anyone. Then we have a boy desperately seeking his identity, afraid of what the future holds for him, and in danger of being swallowed up by the world around him. Violence brings them together, and then tears them apart, and in the movies final, climactic, scene, you see what a true hero is willing to sacrifice to give the people he's come to identify and sympathize with a chance to make a future for themselves.

GRAN TORINO is a complex but entertaining movie, masterfully directed, with a memorable performance by one of Hollywood's true greats, on and off the camera, that defied my expectations. I was expecting a good movie, and instead I got a GREAT one. A movie that combines subtlety with straightforwardness, and filled with great humanity.

On a side note, GRAN TORINO is also significant in that I can now add it to the short list of movies that have actually brought a tear to my eye. What can I say? It unmanned me.

ZACH WORTON: Working Class Hero.

http://flashcitrus.blogspot.com/

I know I have a very limited readership of basically people that know me personally, who read my blog because they see me in person at least once a week and are afraid I'm going to spring a pop quiz on them, all like, "Oh, this is just like that thing I wrote on my Blog... DID YOU READ THAT OR NOT, ASSHOLE!?!" So most people know that I hang out at and volunteer a lot of my time at my favorite comic book store in the world (so far... I haven't been to Japan yet), THE BEGUILING, and have health social interaction with the staff. One of whom is comic artist Zach Worton (whose other blog BALLAD OF A CROSSHATCH JUNKIE, I also link to at the side of this page).

Zach is currently splitting his time between working on an original graphic novel about the Gold Rush called "KLONDIKE", which looks to be a pretty sick piece of historical fiction, something I've only recently begun to take interest in, mostly because of things like DEADWOOD and ME AND THE DEVIL BLUES: The Life of Robert Johnson, and being resentful of how socially awkward nerds go around confirming all the negative stereotypes about comics that he hates.

Zach's a great guy, and I admire him greatly. He's the hardest working guy I know, and has a work ethic similar to mine, which I respect greatly, because when I really get worked up (heh... puns) and really get into that "workhorse zone", I tend to get frustrated with people that can't keep up with me; which is, most times, totally unfair, because I do a physically demanding job on a regular basis. I am also prone to taking any job I'm doing too seriously, because I'm afraid of letting anyone down. Thus, I like working with Zach because he can lift heavy shit, mostly uncomplainingly (you can't NOT complain about backbreaking phyical labor, no matter what your work ethic is like), for long periods of time, and with great speed. Zach is the kind of that that, when presented with a difficult task, does not hesitate or waste time voice the "injustice" of the task, nor does he tip-toe around it leaving it till th last possible moment, but rather tackles it head on and gets the fucking job done.

When he's not lifting the shit out of boxes at the store, though, Zach has me totally beat, because he goes home to his second job working on comics; something I've been putting off for far too long. Which is what brings us to the whole point of this post... I am utterly amazed that Zack is producing not only his graphic novel, but a series of short webcomics, which you can read at his new comics blog FLASHCITRUS.

I'm a little embarassed to admit that I just found out about this today, because I haven't been keeping up with people's blogs, but I'm glad I decided to do so today. I don't read any webcomics (well... I read NO PINK PONIES), mostly because... I fucking hate webcomics. It's irrational hatred based on broad generalizations and bad experiences I've had with webcomics, which, in theory, is a totally valid medium that just happens to produce mostly VAPID, DISHONEST BULLSHIT. Seriously, every since THAT WEEKLY stopped, I have not given a shit about webcomics. ENTER ZACH WORTON.

Now, a lot of this might be me projecting, as I actually know Zach and and can confirm it, but FLASHCITRUS, though only a few strips long thus far, is the most brutally honest and unforgiving observational humor strip I've ever seen. It's mostly about venting frustration, but there's a subtle self-depricating side to it as well. I'm also impressed with Zach's utter willingness to tackle uncomfortable subject matter, such as his feelings on growing old and death, after being forced to confront his mortality when visiting his girlfriends grandfather. The style he chose to draw the comic in, that psuedo-OWL magazine looking funny animal style, goes a long way to difusing what would otherwise become a total downer of a self-introspective story while at the same time adding a fun visual contrast between obviously cartoon visuals and the most serious, viseral, subject matter of the strips.

I really hope to see more of these in the future, and would like to maybe see them collected in a nice little book at some point. Good job Zach; you've made me not hate webcomics again.

SPEAKING OF DRAGONBALL...

Now... I'm not going to say I told you so, but... I fucking told you so.

This is WAY more terrible than even I expected it would be. Why would you bother to license a hugely popular franchise to make a live action adaptation, and then the only element you keep of the original source material is THE TITLE and the NAMES OF THE CHARACTERS?

I don't even fucking care. This is pitiful. Fuck it. I'm not even curious to see how back they fucked it up, because I can already tell they fucked it up BAD.

In closing... FUCK DRAGONBALL EVOLUTION.

"YO! SON GOKU AND HIS FRIENDS RETURN" (Thank you Nadia Oxford)

Part2
Part3
Part4

Because I remain as if a small child inside, I present to you Toriyama's new DRAGONBALL OVA. Thanks to Nadia Oxford (AKA Mumbling Kitsune) for alerting me to it through her column on the unfortunately shitty new ANIMEONDVD site (sorry... Mania fucked it up. It used to be much better).

While this probably won't register on many peoples radars as being anything all that signifigant, as it's sort of a fluffy filler story, it's a nice bit of oldschool anime fun. Basically, there's a big party and everyone's invited in an almost Perez-esque character-wad, which is interupted by Vegeta's long lost loser brother, Tarble, who was exiled long ago for being an embarassing wuss. He crashes onto Earth with his ridiculous looking Pac-Wife and pleads for his big brother's help in beating up some Freeza-Level Space-Jerks. Goku and the gang, hungry for some action as they haven't put the boots to some kind of God-Like Cosmic Menace for almost two long years, argue about who will handle this new menace. After drawing radish straws, it's decided that these new alien threats will be deligated to the children, who need training anyways. Hilarity and property damage ensue.

As much as I love the episodes of DRAGONBALL where stuff gets blowed up, my favorite episodes were actually ones like this, were you get to see these characters completely out of their regular context. My absolute FAVORITE episode of DRAGONBALL is actually a filler episode, which was never in the manga, but could easily have fit in with Toriyama's brand of nonsensical pratfall humor, is the one where Chi-Chi forces Goku to go get his Drivers License, and Picollo decides to challenge him to a Drivers License-off, which almost destroys and entire city, and totals their respective cars. This episode is more up that alley, which is one of the strengths of DRAGONBALL that has made it an endearing fan favorite for the past 25+ years; the frictionless marriage of over-the-top martial arts action with ridiculous prat-fall comedy.

So while this episode doesn't really come off as being all that significant in terms of giving content starved DRAGONBALL fans any sort of closure post-series closing (DRAGONBALL has one of those typical shonen manga, "And they had adventures FOREVER" endings that's not actually an ending), it is a fun, nice looking, diversion that reminds one of why they liked this series in the first place, and why they still like it.

GATCHAMAN: I'm On Board for This Too.

I'm soooooooooooooo fucking on board for this.

ASTRO BOY Teaser: GET ON BOARD, MUTHAFUCKERS!

How can this not excite you?

How are you not filled with the awe and excitement of your youth? How can you not be overwhelmed with nostalgia?

When I was a kid, probably around 6 or 7, I got up at 6:00 every day to watch first THE MIGHTY HERCULES, but that what I was really up to see was ASTRO BOY. And, as the impressionable young boy that I was, what I took from that show was that I wish, hoped, and dreamed... that I was a robot. For real, no exaggeration. I wanted to be a robot. A robot with a heart and soul. The protector of humanity and robot-kind alike; the World's hero.

I remember so many great stories from ASTRO BOY... the robot liar, the Snow Leopard, the Robot God, Uran's Twin, Robio and Jullie-8, and of course, the greatest of them all; The World's Strongest Robot. Stories filled with adventure, romance, imagination, and likable, memorable, characters.

But why is it ASTRO BOY resonates so much with a young boy, like I was? I think it might be that I projected myself into Astro... though a robot, he had a family, friends, and went to school. And while he eventually gained friends, at first he was picked on and ostrecised for being different... hell, looking at his origin, he was even horribly abused by first his father, and then the robot circus he was sold into; but he persevered. He questioned the descisions of adults and had a childhood niavitte that I could identify with; he just wanted to save everyone. Astro didn't judge the villian, but rather looked for a compromise. That didn't mean he was stupid though. Astro was incredibly smart, and after some deliberation, his positronic brain could come up with the optimum solution to any problem. Astro represents childrens empowerment fantasy at it's finest, because it emphasises the best qualities of a hero: Honor, respect for all life, seek compromise before conflict, but take decisive action, and most importantly, use your strength to help others. Thus it was through that projection, that fantasy, that I shaped my moral compass.

So as to this trailer... am I excited? You bet your ass! What I don't get is why other people aren't? While looking for the trailer, all I came across was petty bitching and moaning; people that didn't like the look of it, that questioned the need for a revitalization of a childhood classic, that didn't think Tezuka would approve of the use of computer animation... Fuck that.

How does it look? EXCELLENT. IMAGI is a great studio that's been slowly but surely tempering their craft, and TMNT, while not a perfect movie, was nevertheless well directed and had some pretty astounding animation, and more importantly, art direction. I think that Tezuka's art actually lends itself quite well to computer animation because designed with animation in mind; every single character in Astro Boy is simply constructed with solid, geometric, volumes and very little unnessessary detail, which lends itself greatly to computer animation (as a student of animation myself, I have to say, the simpler the structure, the easier to animation). My only real critical point is that I wish the eyes on Astro were bigger than they are. But look at what they show us; the tunnelling through the ground, arms flailing wildly, flashlight eyes, and exploding through Mount Fuji, are both lifted directly from the 1960's opening of the show. This shows me that they're being true to the character. I'll even wager they put the machine guns in his ass.

As to the need to bring Astro back... have you ever watched kids movies, or saturday morning cartoons these days? Have you seen what we're teaching our kids? I'm not saying it's all garbage, but... what do kids learn from fucking BRATZ, WINX CLUB, SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS, or FAIRY GODPARENTS? It's all vacuous, commercial, and mean spirited. Have you ever just HUNG OUT with kids these days? O_O Do we need to revitalize a hero that once served faithfully as a positive rolemodel for everything that one should aspire to be? You're damn right! And all the better that it's something from everyones childhood; parents should be able to identify with their children, and there's nothing kids love more than to have their interests validated by adults, rather than being met with a condesending, "That's nice dear." Children's eyes sparkle when you show interest in what they are interested in. How many parents can tell their children stories of a character they loved that the children haven't heard of? "You think that's something? Why I remember the time Astro had to save the world's Seven Strongest Robots from Pluto, the Strongest Robot of them all!"

As for whether or not Tezuka would want to see Astro in all his 3D animated glory? Are you fucking kidding me, here? The man practically invented animation the Japanese! To his dying days he was on the forfront of artistic innovation. If he had a chance to actually build a robot boy with a 10,000 horsepower heart, he would have. As much nostalgia I have for classical animation, especially pretaining to this character, Astro Boy isn't about the past; he's about the bright and shining future. The promise of a better tomorrow. PROGRESS! INNOVATION! HOPE! Astro Boy has already conquered every aspect of the two-dimensional medium; time for the next.

So get on board with me people. Leave behind your pessimism and anger! Leave behind your paranoia and selfishness! Leave behind your anxieties and fears! By embracing a nostalgic hero of the past, may we find hope for a brighter tomorrow!

Trailer Time Again

STAR TREK XI



I still have this horrible feeling that this movie is going to suck, and this trailer sort of confirms that suspicion in a way, as it feels VERY un-Trek-like... but I will say this: at least it looks like shit happens in this movie. ALL THE TIME. Like... shit just constantly happening. Which has always been my one big beef with STAR TREK. That there are usually HUGE GAPS between shit happening, in which shit does NOT happen. Anyways, I'm still out on this one.

Of course I'll still see it.

JCVD

http://www.apple.com/trailers/independent/jcvd/

I actually already saw this, and I should probably give it it's own blog post, but JCVD (Jean Claude Van-Damme) was fucking AWESOME. It was everything you could want in a movie; funny, action packed, and a meaningful examination of the human condition. I really loved this movie, almost to the point of being moved to tears, TWICE.

FRIDAY THE 13th

http://www.apple.com/trailers/wb/fridaythe13th/

FRIDAY the 13TH is sort of a guilty pleasure of mine... I also like some of the HALLOWEEN movies as well, for the same reasons. See... the hero of these movies are not the teenager victims, but the murderous killers themselves, who punish these kids for being stupid, selfish, self absorbed and ignorant fucking TEENAGERS. Notice how the survivors are always the intelligent, open minded, virgins that don't smoke pot or have promiscuous sex... their reward for not being idiot whores is that they get to see adulthood! Jason is trying to SAVE HUMANITY by culling the dead weight of society! As is Micheal Myers. Now, the one difference between the characters is that you have no sympathy for Micheal Myer's, because he has no real motivation to kill these people other than pure malice and the fact that he's FUCKING INSANE. Jason, though, is an almost tragic figure in that he's motivated by a child's desire for revenge. Born deformed and probably a little mentally handicapped, he was mistreated and generally abused by his peers, and cruelly murdered through ignorance and neglect. That doesn't make his unending kill-krazy rampage right, but you can understand why he does it... especially after his mother's death drove him even further into insanity (as if DYING didn't fuck him up enough in the head...).

Anyways, yeah... I can't really justify wanting to watch this movie any more than I can justify having watched all the others. All I know is that usually every even numbered FRIDAY THE 13th is pretty good, while the even numbered ones make no fucking sense whatsoever. JASON X is actually pretty brilliant if you look at it as more of a self-parody than an actual horror movie... and, as Parrish pointed out, it's going to be pretty hard for Jason to top killing an entire space colony... I mean, he could kill teenagers all year and still only fill a barn with bodies.

MONSTERS vs ALIENS

http://www.apple.com/trailers/dreamworks/monstersvsaliens/

A homage of sorts to 50's B-Movie monsters and aliens... it really just looks like another uninspired DREAMWORKS CGI movie. Like... not terrible, but not terribly good either. The only thing I really took away from this trailer is that Seth Rogan is a fantastic voice actor. I'd probably see this is nothing else was on that weekend, and I had literally nothing else to do... otherwise this really just only looks like bootleg worthy viewing.

TIME CRIMES

http://www.apple.com/trailers/magnolia/timecrimes/

A weird looking foreign film about a time travel gone awry. This actually looks pretty sick.

SEVEN POUNDS

http://www.apple.com/trailers/sony_pictures/sevenpounds/

Parrish and I saw this trailer when we saw QUANTUM OF SOLACE, and both got the same thing out of it: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS MOVIE ABOUT? I have no idea.

TRANSPORTER 3

http://www.apple.com/trailers/lions_gate/transporter3/

After seeing that trailer, I can't believe that this franchise isn't based on a video game... because it looks like it's based on a video game.

I actually really liked the first TRANSPORTER, but the second one was a big pile of poo, so I'm hoping this one can make up for that. Either way, I'll see it for Jason Statham... THE BADDEST MUTHAFUCKER IN FILM, YO!

SPECIAL

http://www.apple.com/trailers/independent/special/

This looks pretty good actually. HANCOCK was really disappointing as a deconstruction of the superhero genre, but this actually seems to really get it. It's about a guy named "Les" who takes an experimental anti-depressant that he thinks gives him super-powers, so he decides the responsible thing for him to do is to become a superhero named "Special." (get it... he's LES until he's SPECIAL, ha ha ha... PUNS and SUPERHEROES are like peanut butter and jam!).

I'll see this.

VALKYRIE

http://www.apple.com/trailers/mgm/valkyrie/

I hate Tom Cruise as much as the next guy, given that he's a crazy douchebag jackass, and I really hate to support him in any way, but... he was funny in TROPIC THUNDER, and this Bryan Singer directed movie looks pretty sick. It's about an attempt to kill Adolph Hitler made by his own people. Like I said... I hate to support Tom Cruise in any way, but a good movie is a good movie.

SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE

http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox_searchlight/slumdogmillionaire/

I really like Danny Boyle, and he's responsible for making one of my favorite movies ever, SUNSHINE (for real... SUNSHINE is probably in my top five), and I got to say... I've heard nothing but good things about this movie, and the trailer looks EXCELLENT. I'd really like to see this.

LET THE RIGHT ONE IN

http://www.apple.com/trailers/magnolia/lettherightonein/

Hey, know what totally looks like a better vampire movie than fucking TWILIGHT? THIS ONE. Seriously, I think this Swedish film has got the right idea of how to go about making a Romance-Vampire movie... romantic, yes, but don't lose the spookiness! This looks like just the right amount of spooky and romantic to me! I'd like to see this, but probably won't get the chance, because the theatre will be filled with teenaged girls excited about seeing FUCKING TWILIGHT, featuring efeminate pretty-boys whose "pale skin sparkles like diamonds in twilight." *Shudder* Yeah, they made the right choice.

THE UNBORN

http://www.apple.com/trailers/universal/theunborn/large.html

A film filled with creepy looking Japanese-Horror movie shit, written by David S. Goyer, who has proven that he can either be really good... or fucking GOD AWFUL depending on who's directing. "Can you be haunted by someone who was never born?" APPARENTLY YOU CAN! HA HA! Again... shit like this is another guilty pleasure of mine.

PLAGUE TOWN

http://www.apple.com/trailers/independent/plaguetown/

More spooky shit.

MY NAME IS BRUCE

http://www.apple.com/trailers/independent/mynameisbruce/

I'd sort of go see this just to see Bruce Campbell in person... though I do like the line, "You need someone to face a heinous monster, and stop him in his tracks..." Heh heh... no one uses the word "Heinous" anymore.

GRAN TORINO

http://www.apple.com/trailers/wb/grantorino/large.html

Clint Eastwood once again proving that you're never to old to be a FUCKING BADASS! A bitter, racist, and hardened old man stubbornly refusing to admit his age, learns the error of this ways when he becomes a vigiliante to protect his chinese neighbours from a vicious street gang. Clint Eastwood is still the fucking man. This movie looks pretty great.

UNDERWORLD: RISE OF THE LYCANS

http://www.apple.com/trailers/sony_pictures/underworldriseofthelycans/high.html

God that's a terrible subtitle... another guilty pleasure of mine, is that I like UNDERWORLD, which is hard to justify after the second movie fucked it up (that Super-Vampire guy was fucking cool though). I don't think we really needed a prequel though.

NOTORIOUS

http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox_searchlight/notorious/

A biopic that I actually give a fuck about. I's gotta represent for Biggie, yo! Still... I can't believe they made a movie about Biggie before they made a movie about Tupac. That seems fucked up somehow. Either way... this movie will have a great soundtrack.

THE SPIRIT

http://www.apple.com/trailers/lions_gate/thespirit/

I can't help but feel that this film will quite possibly be fucking unwatchable. It looks like Frank Miller jerked off onto celuloid. Good GOD. >_<

HOUSE

http://www.apple.com/trailers/independent/house/

Is this a remake of the 1980's movie HOUSE (I can't actually remember what that movie was about...)? Or is this a really off the wall theatrical re-imagining of the popular TV medical drama, HOUSE?